I would love nothing more than to go on a giant shopping spree. I know that you love to call me 10 times a day and I really appreciate all of the offers to take out an equity loan on the current house I am living in. I understand that you already have an application on file from me (I wonder who filled that out). I am just throwing this out there, but I am pretty sure my landlord would not appreciate me taking out an equity loan on the house that he owns.
Also, I will have to check my records, but I am positive that I already won 24 cruises and 30 gas vouchers this week. I especially like when I answer the phone and the first thing I hear is a loud cruise ship horn blowing in my ear. Maybe if you made the horn noise a little more obnoxious I would bite.
I especially love when I explain to the telemarketer that I don’t own this house and they say “Well, I am sure we can still work with you”.
I really should stop answering the phone. I just can’t help myself!